Just like any normal person, I HATE the whole experience of trying on clothes. I don’t know if it’s the horrible lighting in some stores, the tiny “closet” they put you in or just the whole I have to take off all of this and put it on again. BLAH! I hate trying on clothes. Sometimes, it’s really necessary. Today was one of those days.
I’ve been meaning to do a post about my whole health update. Some things have happened and changes have been made. I’ll talk about that more later on in another post, but I’m happy to report that my body is changing. I’m losing weight and inches are coming off. That means none of my clothes are really fitting me the way I would really like them to. So I went out today on a mission. My mission? To find some new clothes that fit, ha!
Here’s the deal. I have a not-so-normal (what the hell is normal though, really?) body. I am not only “plus-size” (I really hate that term), but I’m also short. That trifecta right there makes it nearly impossible to find pants that fit correctly and today, I didn’t luck out in the pants department. I’m working on that! However, I did find some cute tops.
I noticed something when I got home. I had put a few items back on the racks and basically talked myself out of them. I told myself I looked “fat in this” or “crap in that.” I’m being honest! It’s so hard, as a woman, to sometimes really have an honest conversation with yourself about the way you look, without tearing yourself apart. Did I look fat in the dress I put back? NO! After I got home and looked at the pictures I snapped while trying them on (I like to have it for memory of what I got) I was pissed I didn’t pick it up. I realize that I am way to hard on myself and I need to give myself a break. I’ll never look like the models in the magazines. I won’t be as awesomely put together as most bloggers that I look up to and I’ll probably never love everything about myself 100%, BUT I need to give myself more credit and realize that I’m trying. Hell, even trying on smaller sizes is a HUGE accomplishment.
This was the dress that I put back. I honestly convinced myself that I looked bad in it and it wasn’t worth picking up. This dress is what convinced me to write this post.
Why do we tear ourselves apart? I want to change. I want to be more positive about myself! I’d like to be able to look in the mirror and go “WOW! Awesome!!” Instead of “UGH. This is not good.” I’m not the most positive when it comes to giving myself a compliment and you know what, that totally sucks! I think if we don’t see the beauty in ourselves, how are we ever going to feel good about ourselves? I know one thing, I’m going to go back today and pick up that dress and I’m going to rock it for you guys in an upcoming post!
When did it become so hard for some of us to be so accepting of our bodies and our appearance? We’ve become a society that feels the need to “filter” everything that I think we’ve become so used to editing ourselves, that we don’t know what to do when we don’t alway have that option.
I’d love to hear other women’s thoughts on this whole topic. Do we think men feel the same way when they go shopping? Is it just us? Has the definition of what being “beautiful” means changed so much that we no longer feel, as women, that we can live up it? I’m going to keep this “Fitting Room Confessions” post going on and I might even make a series about it!
I tried on that exact same dress and put it back because it made me look shapeless, even though I loved it! Please tell me you are going back and getting it. One of us has to and I think it looks great on you! xx
I went back and picked it up today! xoxo
I completely relate to this subject and I love your post. Thank you so much for your honesty. I think the biggest problem with the fashion industry is this whole “plus size” nonsense. It sets up this standard of making women feel like they are outsiders from mainstream and that they don’t deserve to look good. Why do we need the “plus size” label? Why can’t we just have sizes that *gasp* keep going without any differentiation between a 12 and an 16? Why can’t designers be expected to make clothes for the majority of the population (which is plus size)? It’s astounding to me that the fashion industry has stubbornly clung to their random sizing (which changes from item to item and brand to brand) rather than decide to embrace the idea that *everyone* deserves to look good and feel good. They’d make more money and I think a lot more women would feel a hella lot more confident in the fitting rooms.
*By the way you do look awesome in that dress. 🙂
YES! THIS!
I love your comment so much! You nailed so many important topics that I don’t even know where to begin to respond. I think the problem I have with the whole fashion industry is that at times, women, including myself, we don’t feel like we’re in the “club.” We aren’t the typical model sizes, which to me isn’t typical at all, and we’re left with less than stellar options. Just because a woman is bigger or even smaller, we all deserve to look amazing! The whole plus-size term just annoys me. I think we all just want clothing options that make us feel and look good! And thank you for the compliment!!
Part of me really wishes I’d gone into fashion design because I really want to see some change in the industry. There’s no reason to have a whole separate (much sadder looking) section for the majority of women in the US. Imagine going to a store and just…shopping? You don’t have to figure out where the plus section is. Or if you are a dreaded 14/16 cusp, you’d finally be freed from having to run between the two sections, trying to determine if you’re “normal” or “plus sized” – which could vary by item and store and brand. Just imagine how much less stressful it would be. Grab a pair of jeans and no worries that it only goes up to a size 10. Knowing that every item you pick up has something for your size 2 best friend and your size 16 self. Imagine choosing the items you love instead of the couple of things you managed to find that fit decently? Imagine how much more fun and engaging and happy fashion would be? I honestly rarely shop in retail stores. I prefer online where I don’t spend hours looking through racks where stuff won’t fit me. I’m in the bad spot where I’m at the top of the “regular” sizes but the plus sizes are just a bit too big or oddly shaped. It’s frustrating. Fashion should be fun, not torture for your self-esteem.
I am in the same position as you! I’m right at the top, but sometimes if I try to go with plus-size, they just don’t fit right!!
That dress was super flattering on you, Christine! I don’t like trying clothes on either. With men, their clothes have specific numbers as sizes that go across the board (ex. Neck/chest size in dress shirts). Why can’t the ladies have that? Sizes are all over the place for every brand that I honestly don’t even pay attention to them anymore. In high school, I had pants ranging from size 0 all the way to size 9. I just try to buy clothes that fit, because looking at the number almost always bums me out.
Thank you, Sammi! Sizes are so crazy and I think we become a bit fixated on the number instead of how it fits us. I’m guilty of that at times!!!
I completely agree with you. First of all the dressing rooms themselves suck! (Have you seen that post about the woman who went into like 20 different dressing rooms and snapped pics of what she looked like in the different lighting?) Second of all, congrats on having to shop for smaller sizes…thats a great accomplishment, for me its been the other way around lately, I need everything a little bigger. Third, that dress actually looks amazing on you. It looks super comfy and the pocket angle is very flattering. I am glad you are going back to get it! One step at a time. xoxo
I have seen that post! Dressing rooms are crazy sometimes. I think some have gotten better about the horrible lighting, but some stores just don’t get it! And thank you! I’ve been working hard! I don’t think it matters what size we are, we are all going through the same issues!!!
The lights in fitting rooms I swear make me insane, I buy the wrong stuff and put back the good stuff. I loveee that dress on you, go back immediately!
The lighting is horrible! Although I will say, some stores have stepped it up and have changed out the super harsh, bright lights for something softer! I already went back and picked it up!
Oh my gosh Christine! First of all…I think you are beautiful just the way you are!! That dress looked amazing on you but i can totally understand the whole “tearing ourselves apart” or not giving ourselves enough credit. Trust me, after two pregnancies, my body isn’t exactly picture perfect. But I am learning to embrace every imperfection and love myself a little more each day 😉
I think next time you should say yes to the dress (lol) and own it girl! Cause you look amazing!!
Xo- http://www.daily-craving.com
Trying on clothes is definitely the worst. I just went shopping over the weekend too and luckily found a few pieces I really liked. My big issue with shopping is whether something is really appropriate or not. Too low cut, too short, too tight…. I’ll see a spaghetti strap dress dangling off a thin model and love how it looks, but lets be real, it’s hard to wear stuff like that in the real world!
I love this, sharing!! I can never find pants that fit, my waist is small but my lower half is large, I’ve yet to find pants that can handle all of that!! Love this!
Thank you so much for writing this post! I’m so glad you went back and got that dress. I have a hard time finding clothes that fit like I want them to. I started learning to sew, so that I can alter them myself.
So glad you wrote this post! We are all way too hard on ourselves, especially in the dressing room. I’m glad you went back and got the dress. You look great in it!
Fantastic post with so much that I can relate to. I’m plus-size too and pretty close to the heaviest I’ve ever been. I just don’t shop anymore because the experience is so painful for me. I try to embrace myself for me, but I can’t stop those demons in my head. Thanks for the reminder to love myself more. Now, go back and get that dress (if you already haven’t)!
I feel a little guilty about this post – I’m sure you learned some of this from me. I can be the hardest person on myself. I hate clothes shopping. I guess I’m not aging gracefully and don’t deal with it well. Sorry. I think you are very beautiful and you always look fabulous! (At least when you want to – ha ha). That dress looked great on you – I hope you did go back and buy it!
I’m all about the buy and try. I buy everything, try it on at home and see how I actually feel about it then return what I don’t want. Target probably hates me but I buy everything with cash so hopefully they’re not tracking me :):):)
Great post 🙂